the night has a thousand eyes

hii.

i haven't written in here since I found out about Nelson, so i'm going to now i guess.

Not much has happened lately. Nelson's funeral was on Wednesday at St Benedict's Smithfield. It was alot more saddening than a funeral usually is, i think personally. Maybe it was because it was a suicide, i'm not sure. I don't think i've cried so much. I will never forget when his parents leaned into the coffin and we're speaking to his body as if he was still alive, stroking his hair and kissing him. Heartbreaking, is the only word I can relaly choose to describe what it felt like to see that.

It was pretty uneventful after that, except when that guy fainted on me. ow -_-.

And lol, even though it was such a sad day, Ninorta still managed to make me and Denita laugh. For example:

Nino: Omg man, this would be the best day to commit crime . . . all the cops are HERE !

and then
*benita is crying*
Nino: oh my god benita. . . YOUR MAKE UP :V .


gosh i love you nino <3
and denita and yonita
i'm so happy that you guys were there with me, and that we could support each other (L)

so yeah, following that day, nothin much interesting happened. Sure, my parents were on holiday, but Yonita was still home. So no rebellious or idiotic antics. Unfortunatley.

THENN on the weekend i got shipped off to Kings Langley to stay with auntie Nina whilst Yonita went to Hunter Valley. I love my aunt and uncle, but thank God for my cousin Rameil, who stopped me from going insane via boredom.

He full took me to ap izza hut owned by his friend who let us into the back kitchen. Thankyou Nigel and the other dude for custom making our pizzas, which were EPIC.

. . .
now i feel like pizza. fml.

TOMORROWW
hopefully i'll see Ivana or something. i've missed her since she went Melbourne.
and then ill see denita on tuesday
and hopefully going swimming at endy's sometime this week .
hopefully

BYE : )

RIP <3

NELSON DAVID FAUL
24/01/92 - 27/12/09
"Life is what you make of it"

Today, the world has lost a star. Today, Nelson David Faul decided to take his own life.

Already, the world seems that little bit more darker, a little bit more bleak. A little bit more worthless. I'll never forget the memories I got to have with you, though I wish i had more. I only knew you for about two years, but thats all the time i needed to figure out how wonderful, smart, funny, talented and how much of a great person you were<3

You were meant for great things, you had every option for your future available to you. You were so talented that it was unbelievable. I wish you could have stayed here on Earth just a little bit longer. But this is what you wanted, and thats a consellation, that at least now you're happy and at peace.

I've only got a few memories of you. I'll never forget the breaks i had with you at work. You were so funny and kind, asking me if I wanted anything and us laughing at your school ID card which was so dorky haha. Oh my god, hahah, you were my scream teacher! You promised to teach me how to do all that scream/growl shit. You were so funny, you were like "it feels like you're chucking a shit!" LOL ! and that time we were bitching about Dylan, and you were like "Omg please tell me you didn't fuck him!" that was pretty mad too =].

More than anything, my heart goes out to your family. Your parents, your brothers Matthew and Nicholas, as well as your sister Samantha. God, I can't imagine what state they are in. I just want to say to them, i'm so, so, sorry for your loss, and I wish i could somehow help. And to all your friends, whats happened is such a tragedy, but be strong.

Its sad though, knowing that when I walk into McDonalds, he wont be working in the back area. It hurts to think how when I go to a gig, Pray for death wont be on the list, and Nelson won't be there to shit on other bands with his talent. It all hurts.

I'll never forget you.
I'll miss you, Nelson David Faul.
See you on the other side <3>

That boys a monster . . .

HE ATE MY HEART
i love that girl

HE ATE MY HEART

i wanna talk to her, she's hot as hell ♥

A few days ago, I bought Lady Gaga's limited edition copy of 'The Fame Monster'. Truly, it was the best money I think i have ever spent. It's so unbelievable how she can still manage to come up with new tunes and melodies. Though she sometimes writes about the same thing, she always manages to do it in a different way, a way in which you can connect with on an individual level. It's not like you have to be Lady Gaga, to understand what she's talking about. Afterall, who hasn't suffered things like heart ache or constant annoying telephone calls?

So, after listening to The Fame Monster during every waking moment, I have specifically fallen in love with the track, 'monster'. I'm not sure if its the lyrics, or the way that the song uses imagery of a monster as a metaphor for a man, but I love it. Not only is it a good song, but its sort of true. Boys are monsters, and appropriatley, Gaga uses the line 'he ate my heart'. She's got it spot on. Thats exactly what it feels like when you like a guy or are having romantic problems or whatever. It feels like he ate your heart. Asshole.

Fuck this thing sounds like an english essay . . . shudder.

ok, whatever.
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE !
i dont know about you, but I had a pretty mad christmas at my aunties house. Us Assyrians go off. Before anyone asks, NO, we do NOT blow up shit to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

But we've though about it ;).
Basically my Christmas was all about presents, family and a shit load of food. Predominatly meat. YUM ! Sadly, Christmas will be over in 1 hour and 42 minutes. . .

I'm gonna go enjoy the rest of it <3
love you all <3

you're a shining star

. . .
i got a roller shutter on my window today.
. . .
dont know what im really meant to use it for. The sun doesn't shine into my room, so its not useful for that. I can't put pics on it or anything. It has this mad twisty knob thingy though.

I guess it would be useful to keep out any unwanted visitors. Like rapists and pedos.

Yay im going dinner tonight, with Ivana. I haven't done that in ages, and tbh, i kinda miss her. More than that though i miss hanging with everyone else. I haven't really been out much since schoolies. Apparently I have a bad attitude and i need to be incapacitated. I hope that Deni gets to come. That would be fun (:

i haven't got much to write today, but i just want to get into the habbit of actually maintaining my blog. oooh, i re-arranged my room, put up new photos and rearranged the photos too. Ive been adding new bands to my iPod, cause, well, according to Bunyan my iPod is totally 'shit off its tits'. haha.

Oh by the way, get better Alex <3 !

and sigh, I miss josh :(.

now im off to do something. I guess. (:

liccccccccccccccck !

Ill take this to my grave.

I did it. After months of not doing it and resisting the urge whenever I was in a crap mood, i did it. I'll probably regret it tomorrow morning. But hey, I guess i'll worry about that tomorrow morning.

Cause right now, its the best feeling in the world.

baby . . .

You will never fall apart,
Diana you're still in our hearts.

Never let you fall apart,
together we'll dance in the dark.

Baby loves to dance in the dark,
Cause when he's looking she falls apart.
Baby loves to dance in the dark.

Baby. . .

Baby loves to dance in the dark,
Cause when he's looking she falls apart.
Baby loves to dance, loves to dance in the dark.

In the dark.

HOT CHILD IN THE CITY <3

OMG. so yeah. um. fuck i forgot what i wanted to type.
OH YEAH
I HAVE FINALLY FOUND THE MUSE TO WRITE A BLOG ! THANKYOU FUCKING JESUS! WOOO

i haven't written one in almost 2 months. eek.
so yeah, not much has happened since my last post (graduation).

I had my formal ( which was mad). It began and ended with alot of fucking photos being taken, which i still have to upload (soz ivana). I especially love the one of me and ivana relieving ourselves in the boys urinals. I bet no one else could do that in high heels ! *shakes fist*

by the way, Tk just wants to shout out and say "Tk rules, people suck."

You know, cause tk isnt a person, hes some weird half man half machine thingy cause he never stops eating protein and going to the gym. and lolol he's gonna marry me for a week (: !
then he'll divorce me . asshole

Anyway back to me and my life. There weren't many exciting things after formal except for schoolies ;]

I journeyed up to the central coast with Ivana, Joe, Zac, Cayla, Erika, Bronte, Ricky, Alex and James :).

i can't be fucked writing paragraph after paragraph on miniscule detail of what went on at schoolies cause to be honest, you probably don't want to know.

SO I WROTE A LIST

· Firstly, I lost my mums camera and subsequently got dragged home by le madre, then dropped off back at terrigal the next day in a mad hotel. Thanks mum (Y)

· Oooh, that awesome piano that played by itself =D. I swear, I will own one.

· I will never forget those British lads that borrowed Zacs shoes in exchange for beer and then tried to get with me at 3am LOL. I quote “So, this Benita, she’s not attatched to any of you yeah, shes free game yeah?” and then "Benita . . . BENITA? YOU WILL OBEY!"

· Me and Erika’s memorable table dancing to Jay Sean. That was fun <3

· Bronte’s attempt at being a unicorn, oh god, the lawlz <3

· Watching a lizard crawl up Zac’s leg, and then watching him get chased by derro kids. Btw he named the lizard Jackie. (cue ivana: WHOREEEEEEEEEEEE)

· Like all other schoolie events, our week at schoolies included hook ups, alcohol & cigarettes. Its just not natural to not have those things.

· Id like to give a shout out to Liana & co for their free alchimohol.

· Hungry wolf pizza and pasta = EPIC.

· It was kind of grosse, living off mi goreng and pizza for a week. I felt like a single mother, feeding her three very hungry and abusive children (zac, ivana and joe).

· Laughing as Ivana’s voice box slowly deteriorated to some raspy thing that you’d expect to hear in a horror movie, that was awesome <3.>

· Omg, all those memorable sayings such as:

- YOUR TOTES A WANKER.

- E.I.N.C !

- Sitting on the toilet (other variations include ‘sittin on an arab’ and ‘sittin on YOUR FACE’

- YOUR FACE

- Wheerrreesss the chapstick?

· Oh God, me and Ivana shitting our pants when we were at the beach at midnight and then all the lights turned off xD

· That awesome and totally epic hot tub at James’.

· Playing ping pong with Zac at 4am (:

· “Is that your boyfriend? No? Does he have a boyfriend?”

· Dancing to Bad Romance with Ivana was lovely. We should do it again (Y)

· And I would like to commend my bravery, cause unlike Alex and Ricky, I actually had the bravery to hold a conversation with chicks that I shotgunned (:

all in all, schoolies 09, at terrigal was mad , and i would definitely go again :)

Voila. That’s schoolies for you bitch.

ohh, and i finally found my song for 2009.

hot child in the city - pat benatar